Ignoring hardship and pain is not stoicism or positivity.
Wallowing in it, is not validation but staying stuck.
Feeling pain and acknowledging your hardship but also finding the space to think "what am I grateful for? What has been good? What can I learn from this?" is positive psychology.
Telling your mirror reflection that you're pretty and smart and a super hero when you feel ugly, stupid and useless are not helpful affirmations.
Telling the inner voice that is criticising you to f off is fighting negativity with negativity.
Telling your inner critic that even if it was true that you're ugly, it really doesn't define your worth, or to acknowledge that you've received confirmation elsewhere that you're not as ugly as you think, or looking at the evidence of what you can do - work, complete a degree, read or write or hold a conversation with another person is evidence that you're not as ugly, stupid or useless as you think - those are healthy strategies for self-talk.
Seeing your inner critic as an external bully and not identify with it, but rather notice is for what it is - a bully - and addressing the bully with kindness and curiosity - are helpful strategies for lasting change.
Until next time, take care, stay safe - and sane - and make kind choices!
Here at School of Thoughts we stand for and promote a
#CultureOfImperfection #GenerousContribution #RadicalKindness #EthicalDecisions #HaveFunBeFree
This is a daily, micro-blog, taking less than 2 minutes to read, offering you insights into how presumptions, beliefs and stories shape our lives and worldview, for better or worse.